Stay Connected : Tearing Down Fences and Putting In Doors
How often in our lives especially as children did we have to build fences? Or were fences built by others, keeping us out?
FENCE – 1 archaic: a means of protection: DEFENSE
2a: a barrier intended to prevent escape or intrusion or to mark a boundary especially: such a barrier made of posts and wire or boards
b: an immaterial barrier or boundary line…
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fence
There was a time we needed our fences solid and strong both to keep the pain out and to hold in our vulnerabilities, vulnerabilities caused by trauma (generational, historical, and new traumas) and fears (fear of doing the wrong thing, fear not being good enough, fear of being harmed…).
It may not be the time to tear down all the fencing we built – it may never be. So, let’s tear down the fences that are safe to tear down and let’s add a few doors to one that aren’t. Doors that can be opened to let the fresh air and sunshine in.
DOOR – 1: a usually swinging or sliding barrier by which an entry is closed and opened
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/door
As for the fences built to keep us out ‘no way’. We don’t need to waste the effort to tear down fences to places we don’t want to go. But, if we want to go there, as long as it isn’t someone else’s protected place. Let’s go. It may mean climbing a few fences, learning certain skills and/or developing new understandings. Let’s go.
Sometimes when we crawl over a fence or two, we find out it isn’t where we truly want to be, so, then let’s move on.
Let’s open our fencing adding doors when needed
Let’s learn the skills we need to open other fences closed to us